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There's nothing scarier than people your age doing better than you

"I saw that someone gifted your baby a pair of itty bitty Converse. Your baby doesn't even listen to The Strokes so I don't know why they did that."

"If I can't stand at the most inconvenient location, I will die."

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"Anything for a friend."

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Topical jokes from a Warner Bros. Discovery program I applied to. Applicants were asked to write from the POV of John Oliver, Samantha Bee, or Jon Stewart.

Spec script for Abbott Elementary. 

Janine attempts to resolve a petty issue with a student after stumbling upon her diary. Results vary.

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